shutting down....

life has been getting on top of me a lot lately.... so I have made the decision to stop using my Facebook business page and to sew for enjoyment again, I have loved making babyslings for others but my health is still really crap so I need to cut back on something.

I know this is the right choice for me at the moment, my kids need me, and I need them, we have a hectic couple of months in front of us with the election, 2 birthdays, a trip to Chch for Ben's Graduation and all the Christmas stuff too, I also have 4 hospital appointments in the next month as well.

So for now I am putting Black Bow designs away, I will look at it again next year.

love D

health stuff happening

I had the hospital ring today and I am to see the Gynaecology consultant on the 5th of October which is 2 weeks away, not too bad sooner would have been good though. I am to see Dr Hansen who was the person who did my ectopic pregnancy surgery, so at least I know who she is.

I got another phone call too today from ultrasound, they had a cancellation so I am getting my scan done at 3pm today, its a pain time because of school pick up but you don't say no to things like that. So things are moving well on the one front for my health.

I am still in a lot of pain though, I didn't get to sleep before 3am this morning and that was after being up 3 times for pain relief. Its getting hard as me being sick is impacting a lot on the kids and Ben.

Now just to get the colonoscopy etc done so we can see if there are any other issues that need dealt with health wise.

so yay for moving forward slowly, I am a bit freaked though as the Dr on Saturday mentioned that they may have to take one ovary or do a hysterectomy, it was a bit like "whoa hold on", thankfully we are finished having children but at 34 I feel a bit young to be making those decisions. Yes its only a uterus, I guess it seems rather final etc. I cannot really explain it, maybe if I was a bit older it wouldn't be such a big deal, or if I had yucky heavy periods etc but I don't so its feeling pretty radical at the moment.

I am hoping though that it wont come to that and that its just going to be  routine laproscopy to remove the cyst.

D xx

health issues... finally ? getting somewhere

after turning up to my GP 3 days in a row by Friday morning we had had enough so off to A and E I went. We were hoping to get a bit further ahead with finding out why I was in lots of pain... and yay we have started solving part of the puzzle.

Firstly the ovarian cyst on the right burst on Tuesday which is whats caused all the pain this week, but during an ultrasound scan they found a cyst on the left, that isn't filled with fluid and that needs to be removed very soon, so I am to get another scan and be seen by Gynae/Ob clinic too to organise surgery etc to get rid of this cyst.

We are no further ahead with the other part of the pain thing but at least we are getting somewhere with this part of it.

xx D

there is a Doctor in the house

Benjamin did his PhD defense on Tuesday and passed.... He started it when Miss K was 12 months old, she turned 8 in July, wow its still sinking in that its all over, I am so proud of him, its been a huge task and its taken a toll at times on all of us, him included but its over and we can look towards the future and whatever that may bring.

So huge congrats my darling, its been a long road to here but we got there.

xx D

400 posts

wow a milestone, I have been blogging for around 3 years now so 400 posts is pretty good going... so yay me, and I must try to not neglect my blog so much, but life has been full of more downs that ups lately so its made it hard to get moving let alone blog.

D

end of an era

Yesterday I breastfeed Miss N for the last time, its been an awesome journey with her but I needed to stop for some health reasons. She is 21 months this week so I have done amazingly well, my aim was to get to 14 months and I definitely passed that one.

I am a bit sad about it, she is definitely my last child so its the end of  nearly 9 years of being pregnant, breastfeeding, or ttc, man that sounds like ages when you say it like that, I have spent over 56 months breastfeeding, and over 3 years pregnant ( i think)...

farewell that chapter of our lives, and lets see what happens next

our week

its school holidays but the last couple of days I have spend with Miss K in hospital, tonight she is home on a night pass but we are to report back at 8am for the dr's rounds. The reason for this trip is the continuing pain shes had since she was sick in Dunedin. Her temp was up on Tuesday so I took her to our Doctors, he decided she needed to be seen so he sent us to the Childrens assessment unit and they admitted her. We were hoping to get an ultrasound scan on Wednesday but the sonographer was sick, the same happened today, hence why we are at home for the night.

She needs the ultrasounds so they can determine if shes got a strcutural issue with her kidney or if its a pain issue from the infection she had. Either way we cannot move forward until they do this scan.

 Fingers crossed that she gets it tomorrow

my big girl turned 8

wow, it seems surreal in someways that she is 8, maybe its because I don't actually feel that much older than the 26 I was when I had her, which ever it is though shes 8 now lol.....

We had an awesome party for her, we took some friends of hers roller skating, it was great fun, and a perfect thing to do on a cold winter day, She had a great cake made by the awesome Deborah and her girls and cupcakes that I made too.... I actually stepped out of my comfort zone to do baking this year.

Miss K reckoned it was her best birthday yet....

still not well

and I really am at a loss as to why. I spent last night in A&E again with abdominal and chest(lower) pain, they x rayed me and gave me painkillers, did blood tests and sent me home at 8am this morning with no answers at all to why its happening.

The closest clue we have is a small ovarian cyst on my right side, its about 3.8cm so not large by any standard but it is about the only thing that pinpoints any of my symptoms.

We are no further ahead with Miss K either, shes still got pain in her back, and has got clear blood and urine results, we are hoping that an ultrasound will help show whats going on, but its going to be 3-4 weeks at least before that happenes as shes not considered urgent to be seen.

We are just so over it all, even hubby is sick now with a sore throat, N has croup and O and L have colds. Yay that its school holidays for the next two weeks from Friday

neglected blog

we have just been through a hugely rough period of time, it started in May with my Grandmas diagnosis of Lung Cancer and has gotten progressively worse since then.

In mid May Miss K got chicken pox, 2 weeks later our other three children got them too... this was pretty rough but we got through it.

Grandma passed away on the 16th of June, we had known all week that things were getting worse, she had had a minor stroke and heart attack and we were told to prepared to travel to Invercargill. To add to this the volcanic ash cloud meant that flying was out of the question so we were faced with a long road trip with 4 children.

WE had a gorgeous send off for Grandma, she had a yellow coffin which made us smile, both my bigger girls spoke at her funeral as did my parents and sister and I. We had Grandma at home for the days before her funeral, it made things more natural for all of us. Our children were able to see her, talk about death etc in a natural way instead of via funeral directors etc.

The day after her funeral K got sick, with a kidney infection, we ended up spending 3 nights with her in Dunedin Hospital which was good but another stress at an already stressful time, Shes still getting a lot of pain and we are not sure now that its kidney related at all. I spent last night at A&E with her only to find all her results clear, just pain.
We got home late on Tuesday the 28th after a long trip from Oamaru to Palmerston North in one day. by Saturday night we were back at A&E, this time though with me sick, we thought I have appendicitis but we now are not sure at all whats going on. I only got home on Friday after  a week in hospital.

So that's our 6 weeks of nasty/sad/stressful times. I am so glad that we are over this and that I have an amazingly supportive husband and family

sad news.

not quite sure how to even write about this but I will try, My Grandma has just been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer, I am not really able to explain how I am feeling, but in someways its good that she has a diagnosis as it means that she will get good care at hospice or at home and my aunty who lives with her will have good support too...

I am also trying to cope with my big girls reactions to it too which I am finding really hard, this is their first experience of illness and death and its hard on them too....

love D

got something I have wanted

for so so so long.. yep since I was 6th form I have wanted some 1460 doc marten boots, back then I wanted black, but now I have moved on from there and instead have got shiny pink tartan ones, omg I am in love.

My darling husband and children got them for me for my birthday and they arrived yesterday, 10 days all up from the States is pretty damn good... we got them from Amazon.com because they were $150 cheaper than buying them from a shop here in NZ. Anyway I love them lots and am very happy, now I have to keep my end of the bargain and get rid of some of my excess shoes and clothing from my wardrobe, it was due for a sort out so its not necessarily a bad thing.

love D

34 today

wow so this is what the midis thirties is like hmm... ok, seems fine so far, only one grey hair to account for so far, a few wrinkles, but hey they add character, a few extra rolls around the middle, babies and eating crap do that...some slightly saggy boobs, but a good bra does wonders... so over all not to bad so far.

My delightful husband and children made me pikelets with whipped cream and jam for breakfast and coffee and I didn't even have to get out of bed, yahoo... they are so fantastic, I love them so much, our two big girls organised me a Swamp City Roller Rats t shirt, it was so cool they asked me at skating if I liked it and then they talked to the right person and got one for me, aren't they just awesome.

I have had a lovely day, out for brunch, so quiet time, visitors, phone calls, lots of messages on Facebook, pretty good really.

love D

breastfeeding causes breast implants.. WTF?

there is a terribly written opinion piece in the NZ Herald today, in which a mother bags all of us who choose to breast feed. Its a bloody offensive piece in so many ways, she says that breastfeeding is why women who are unhappy with their saggy boobs have to get implants... wtf, that's insane, choosing to formula feed so you don't get saggy boobs seems rather selfish, I have bottle fed, and I have breastfed, the boobs were getting saggy before I started feeding, loosing weight, gaining weight are bigger factors for saggy boobs that breastfeeding.

The rest of the article was just as bad, sleeping your baby on its back is not to be done because of flat heads? wow so the aesthetic of babies head shape is more important than the risk of SIDS, but she justifies this statement by saying shes upper class and it won't happen to her baby...

I was totally gobsmacked by the arrogance of this woman, shes so totally wrong on so many counts and saying that she knows best because shes rich just takes the cake. Personally I will keep getting my advice on parenting from WHO, Plunket, Health professionals etc, they do know what they are talking about.

and then there is this part 

"Now I understand that for many parents, especially where education levels are low and daily life so tough and frazzled, the notion of a book to record details of the infant's every sleep seems indulgent and precious. And we've all read about methamphetamine-fuelled households filled with multiple 'lifestyle beneficiaries' whose only success is to fail to supply the necessities of life to those tiny babies unfortunate enough to live with them. Obviously sterilising bottles and correctly preparing formula would be beyond many of these people - as would the art of muslin-wrapping. So it's quite understandable that official guidelines should serve as a safety net for the offspring of our most disenfranchised parents, and as an ethical society we wouldn't want it any other way."


totally condescending and not necessary at all, I found the whole article patronising, it belittled the work that Mums do, and it made her come across as a prize bitch who was so selfish that she didn't even try breastfeeding cos she didn't want to have to get implants. I have many friends who bottle feed their children, they do it because for many reasons breastfeeding just didn't work for them. Not one of them did it because of concern about saggy boobs, did she have an elective c section because she was concerned about a saggy vagina? I mean pushing a baby out is surely going to stuff you vagina and make sex less pleasurable because you aren't tight anymore.... And yes I am now being bitchy and judgemental too, (C sections are not nice, and are horrible to recover from and nothing to be joked at either.)

Where do people get off on judging choices that we make? I am educated, and I used that education to make the best choices I can for my children, but I don't offend nearly every Mother I know by making statements like the ones in that article.

project 2011

I have been a bit slack on this, but  heres a rough round up of my last couple of weeks

• made some orders, and been sewing bits and pieces
• survived the school holidays
• had an awesome easter egg hunt
• caught up with friends
• kept skating :)
• had lovely family time

D

Easter

its Easter Sunday and we have just had a big egg hunt,

Miss N has certainly enjoyed it and she worked out what she was up to pretty quickly... eggs=yummy, anyway the photos speak for themselves...

D

new skates

I ordered some skates about 3 weeks ago and they arrived yesterday, I was like a wee kid at Christmas, I have got some Riedell Vixens, with red flat out radar wheels and red laces. I was so excited that I went out to the rink for a skate last night on them and I am in love.

They are lighter than the hire ones, and I can actually turn in them, I need to relearn how to stop etc though as they are looser in the trucks so they move nicer but will take a wee bit for me to get use to them.

I have had awesome service from Trudy at onewoman eight wheels and she came out to drop them off to me and met me at the rink to tune them up a bit too... shes awesome.

My skates are possibly a bit much for me at the moment but I decided it was better to get the best I could afford so that I am not having to look at buying new ones in 8 months time because I have improved etc.

love D

dark feelings snuck up on me

I have just burst into tears because N wanted yet another feed... stupid really... crying over a bloody feed..... I am sitting here surrounded by a huge muddle, the kids are stuck inside cos its been raining and I am loosing the plot in my head...

N is 18 months this week, so its 19 months since I stopped taking my meds (bar 2 weeks last year) but today I am wondering if I should go back on them, my mood is quite low, I am tired for no reason, and cant get out of my own way....


me thinks I better talk to Ben and look at going to see my GP and get sorted. I hate feeling like this, and I know that it will just get worse if I dont sort it out now.

love D

playing sport

I am not a natural athlete, actually I have avoided organised sport for most of my life, I have done some triathlons, but nothing team related or involving contact, well this has all changed, I have started freshmeat training for Roller Derby... and I LOVE it!!! who would have thought I would like sport.

I love the challenge of learning to skate again and the skills that we are learning, I love the sense of belonging, I like getting to wear short shorts and not caring that my butt is huge. I love being with a group of women who aren't judging each other about our looks/weight/backgrounds/kids/incomes. Its amazing. I am finding it so freeing.

I am also enjoying being able to break out of the suburban housewife role that I find myself in, derby gives me an outlet to be aggressive if I want, to be physical, to wear fishnets,  to swear, to be free....

I never thought I would find a sport that I wanted to do, but this I am addicted to, I love it.

project 2011 13/52

sorry I missed last week, I cannot even remember why :)

so this weeks achievements include

• finishing my skirt/trouser pattern drafting course
• making a very stylish skirt
• having a stall at Mamas market
• getting elected onto the Labour party moderating committee to compile our party list
• going out for drinks with derby girls
• managing to do a knee drop and get up without using my hands at freshmeat

I am sure there is more but I am struggling to remember. Life has been really hectic the last few weeks so I am really looking forward to the school holidays and some time out.

love D

pro choice blogswarm

Some awesome feminist writers I know are all blogging about Abortion today, I suggest that you go and read their posts. Try The Hand Mirror, A bee of a certain age, a touch of the crazy for starters, THM has a list of others who have blogged on this too....

I am pro choice, I personally though would not choose to have an abortion, its not something that I would do, but I do not want to project my own moral stance on to every woman that may need to have one. Its about choice, its about our bodies, and about us making the decision that suits us at the time we are making that decision.

I have 3 daughters, I like to hope/wish that they will never be in the position of deciding about continuing a pregnancy or not, but if they are in that situation I hope things will have changed enough so that they not have to convince Dr's that  they are mentally incapable of continuing a pregnancy, and that abortion will be considered a health issue not a part of the crimes act.

It is about choice, it is about having abortion available and it is about women having autonomy over our own bodies, carrying a pregnancy is difficult, I know I have had 5 (1 loss). The physical toll of those pregnancies will stay with me, its not something I would want to go through with because I had no choice in the matter....

I would suggest that you go read the above blogs, their posts are awesome and make lots of sense, mine is more to bring attention to the matter on World Health Day and its an election year, so bring this issue to the attention of MP's and candidates.

project 2011 11/52

I have been slacking with my blogging... life has been busy... and this week I have achieved very little....

• I have made a pattern for trousers tonight at pattern drafting course.
• watched roller derby practice
• spent time hanging out with my sister who is staying with us

I havent done very much at all, I spent the weekend sick in bed with Mastitis so didnt skate this week as was feeling too tired from that. and nothing else is happening either.

love D

project 2011 10/52

mm what have I done this week...

• I have fallen more in love with roller derby training even though its killing me lol
• sewn a skirt from a pattern that I made, yay
• been to Gisborne and back for Labour party stuff
• been to pattern drafting course, am loving that too
• lost 500 grams
• decided to drop the number of breastfeeds Miss N gets

I am loving Roller derby/freshmeat training, its awesome, so physically challenging for me and its a real sense of achievement each time I learn something new. The weight loss is back on track, the skating is helping with that one. I am enjoying learning how to make patterns for sewing, I made a skirt today from my pattern and it fitted beautifully, I need to make some small adjustments to the length and to the curve on the hip otherwise its brilliant.

Love D

project 2011 8/52

Hello, mm just trying to think what I have achieved this week, so weeks it feels like you cannot remember what you did yesterday let alone last week lol.

this week I have

• finished two slings that were ordered
• continued helping with Handmade for Christchurch
• helped the girls do triathlon and skating
• started freshmeat training for rollerderby
• organised for N and I to go to Gisborne for this coming weekend

I cannot think what else I have done, but that seems like an ok list.

back home

yay, Benjamin is home, its been a busy week and its nice to have him back...

I have often read the paper and seen people in power slamming Mums on the DPb, saying that they choose to be on it etc, I have just spent the week parenting by myself with 4 children and I can't say I would be in a hurry to leave what I have just for the money.... it was damn hard work, I couldnt step out when things got to much, I had to do everything, when Ben is here I have the option of back up on issues, someone to take over, or to share the load.

Instead of slamming those women who are on the DPB we should be supporting them, its a tough job being a parent, and even tougher doing it on your own. We should be looking at flexible childcare arrangements if they want to work, we need to think about funding retraining again so that they can get off the DPB and work in meaningful employment if they want to, we should also be supporting their right to be at home with their children too... and thats not happening at all. Its not ok to say if you are on the DPB you should be looking for a job when your baby is 14 weeks old.. its better for that mum and baby if she is supported to look after that baby and has the help finacially to do it....

Its good occasionally to do things differently it gives you an appreciation for how things are.

love D

project 2011 9/52

Sorry I missed last week, but it was too hard to blog...but this week I have been busy

I have :

• nearly finished two slings (one of which is going to a Chch family displaced by the earthquake
• donated a sling to Handmade for Christchurch
• helped behind the scenes with Handmade for Christchurch
• parented alone since Sunday and not gone insane
• Helped the girls do triathlon on Monday, skating on Tuesday, and Girls brigade today, 
• stayed the same weight
• started a pattern drafting course
• Blogged on connect2mums

So a wee bit going on, Benjamin is in Chch helping his family and helping run a foodbank in one of the most affected areas, I am really proud of him and hes doing an awesome job

love D

world turned upside down

On Tuesday our old hometown was torn apart by an earthquake, we have been reading and looking at photos on line, using twitter, and glued to facebook to see that our loved ones are ok... its just devastating and so hard to watch it all...

My parents in law are all ok, and have suffered damage to their houses but that its nothing compared to those that have lost loved ones.

I have offered to be a drop off place for Scamps Eco boutiques collection, and have pledged to make something for handmade for christchurch ( a collective of craft Mums I belong too)... We are looking at sending Benjamin down there to help our family and friends with the clean up.

Its damn hard being here and unable to physically help so I figure that I will just keep using the net and put any info I see out on twitter and facebook, its better than doing nothing.

love D

In the garden

after having coffee on Thursday night with the awesome Deborah, we were sitting in the car admiring my delightfully over grown front garden... actually we were talking about what needed to be gotten rid of and what would look better in its place...

Yesterday I mowed the front lawn and while I had the spade out trying to sort the edges I got carried away and we now have now plants in front of the house bar one which Ben and I didn't have the energy to move... theres still some grass to be tamed but that's ok...

so whats next.. umm we aren't sure, we both love native trees so we are thinking of doing some form of hedge at the front of the section for privacy as white picket fences cost a small fortune and we like trees  that are still living better.... It was really good to get out there and make some difference as it was beginning to look really unloved... it was great getting rid of the nasty huge geraniums and fuchsia's that were well past their best by date.

I have one gripe though... we loaded all the green waste on the trailer and it cost $30 to dump it... was not impressed with that bit of it at all...

love D

project 2011 7/52

wow its really been 6 posts for this already, blimmen heck....

what have I achieved this week....

• have recieved 3 orders to make and bought the fabric to do them
• taken the kids to do the kids triathlons on Monday
• Roller skating lessons for the girls on Tuesday
• found out about roller derby lessons for me
• visited friends
• lost 500 grams, and no I dont need to look for them again :)
• drunk less coke
• blogged for diary of Mumpreneur

not too bad....

love d

project 2011 6/52

so this week has been pretty good, its great having the kids back into school/kindy routine....

things I have achieved this week.....

• sewn a gorgeous ruffled apron as a present for miss L's friend
• weighed in and lost 2kg since starting my losing weight goal// down to 93 kg... down from 99 at this time last year.
• lost 3 cm of 3 of my measurements this week, awesome....
• kept up with myfitnesspal and only gone over in calories today

I have set myself a strange goal to achieve this year, and my hubby doesnt get it at all, I want to fit into my wedding dress... I havent fitted it since I turned 21... yep 13 long years, so I want to fit into it again.... its a size 14/16 and I currently wear a 18. 

love d

out of the mouth of babes

we were talking this morning at breakfast about how tvnz/government was changing Kidzone tv into something aimed at teenagers.... Miss 7 brilliantly says.. they (the government) are like coyote, they just do something and don't think about it first" wow shes so awesome.....

They are rather addicted to watching Roadrunner and Tom and Jerry so see the consequences of not thinking.

I was just using facebook and Miss 7 noticed I have a green twibbon over my picture... whats that for Mama.... that's because the government is giving Kindy's less money and I don't like it.... miss 7 that's bad kindy is important.

I am proud that my kids are growing up with a social conscience and are aware of the world around them

project 2011 5/52

wow its Thursday already, I really have no idea where that week has even gone.... so what have I achieved this week... mmmm


I finally finished the wee skirt I started 3 weeks ago for K.. its so cute, I have made 2 headbands for school, ummm lost a couple of cm's off my hips, got the girls back to school for the year with all the entails, and got O back to kindy with changed hours....

we achieved a family night away in Wellington which was so good, we really needed to have some fun together again after being so stressed recently.

I have dropped Miss N back to one feed at night and we are working on changing that too... Yay.

Not a bad week really when I write it all down.

And not that it was me, but the biggest achievement ever was the submission of Bens's thesis on Monday at Uni, yahoo.....
love D

its so quiet

school and kindy started back today.. and wow is it quiet here..... Bubs is sleeping, and the other three are at school and kindy. It was a good start, we managed to leave before 8:30am, and the girls are both happy to be back. Miss L has lots of friends in her class and so does Miss K. Mr O has started doing 2 mornings a week at kindy which is a change from the 3 afternoons, and his best friend started kindy this morning, it was so nice seeing them all so happy to see their friends.

I joke about living in middle class suburbia, but it does have some nice things that go with it... our children have nice friends, and we can walk them to school, its nice, its comfortable and I am beginning to think that actually its not that bad a place to be.

so my silent time is really weird though after having so much noise and chaos its kind of hard to know what to do next... I have cleaned the kitchen, moved the table so the high chair is in a better spot, and am just about to start on the lounge... wow this having one kid at home might be more productive than I thought.

extremely proud and relieved

Last week was extremely stressful, after trying to get the thesis submitted by the 21st, we came home with it still to be finished.... and it was all ready to send on Thursday, which I helped Ben to do, I saw it all bound and printed and was very proud..... But there was a mistake... word in all its glory had changed the figure titles so it was printed wrong, poor Ben spent Friday fixing it, printing it, couriering it and hoping like anything that it would get to Canterbury University on time for submission today.....

and it got there... what relief... its done, submitted and we can relax for ten minutes (we did this weekend, it was awesome). What comes next is an oral defense of his work to two examiners, then some changes and its finally accepted and he will be able to graduated and add Dr to the front of his Name or use PhD behind it... pretty bloody amazing and I am so so proud of him.

project 2011 4/52

so far I am managing to stick at this, yay me.

I am totally hanging out for school to go back, and I have achieved a few things this week
1. tidied and sorted big daughters clothing
2. half sorted my clothes
3. met a blog/facebook friend in real life for coffee and shes even more awesome than I thought she would be
4. completed my first week using my fitness pal and watching what I eat.
5. cried with happiness because the phd was couriered to Uni today....

not huge things, just little and trying to get through till next week.

for sale one tired grumpy mama

today I am struggling, Mr O will not use his words, instead he screams, and cries about everything and I feel I am losing the plot with him... I don't know what to do...hes fighting with his sisters, kicking, shoving, and being quite aggressive... I just want to yell and scream at him but I know that its not going to help at all..... its a lovely day and I should be happy but I feel miserable... so am thinking that instead of selling the kids maybe we should sell me

home sweet home

we had an awesome 5 weeks at Mum and Dad's and loved being with them.... but there is something nice about coming home to our own space and our own things....

project 2011 3/52

sorry this is 2 days late, we were flat out on Thursday with visitors and packing etc to start heading home from our holiday....

on my achieved this week, I made some nice 3/4 pants for me, and learned that making ruffles isnt fun... I also sold some jackets for a friend via my facebook page....

I started keeping track of my eating too which is good too....

D

eating better

with not walking to school and back everyday and xmas etc my weight has crept up a little bit... so today I am looking at how and what I eat, am going to record everything and see where I can make changes.

it should be an interesting exercise for me and might be a bit scary... I am using my fitness pal..... which helps me track my calories etc...

project 2011 2/52

mm week 2.... my biggest achievement may be rather small but I am really proud of myself... I baked a banana cake all by myself... now this may seems insignificant, but I do not bake... at all... never ever, not since I was at school.... and it tasted good too, yay me

my other achievements this week were to make 2 pair of pants and 2 skirts on Sunday with Mum for Mum.... and I am still doing good with the no coke thing, yay for that too.... I have some other things cut out which I am going to do this weekend.

so not doing too bad overall... no change in weight which is ok.. I am pretty tired so I am not too worried about that one.

love D

lightweight blogger

I read all sorts of blogs, chatty ones, feminist ones, political ones, TV ones.... I was reading some heavy feminist ones this morning which made me question my own personal blogging... I have all sorts of thoughts but I don't often blog about them, I guess I don't want to offend family who might read this... but why?


its my blog yet I worry about others sensibilities when they read it... very strange and maybe I need to think less about this when I am writing. I am not a hugely intellectual writer but I do think a lot about things that are happening around me and in the world at large and so I am going to write more about some of those things too....

So here's to me and writing things that might provoke thought in others.....

gorgeous pictures....

this speaks for itself really...... one lot are more offensive than the others.. I know which ones offend me more.

D

project 2011 1/52

accountability to myself for myself.... this is about me being honest and making progress on goals that I have set myself.....

this week as of Monday I have stopped drinking fizzy drink.... no more sneaky cans of coke in the car, no more drinking over 1l of coke in a day..... coke is a treat... so shall be consumed occasionally at a meal out etc... not for everyday consumption. so 5 days so far without it....

I have weighed and measured myself.... 94.5kg, 119cm hips and bust and 110cm hips and 163cm tall... hourglass without the defined waist... the goal is to get to 75kg... it will take time but I will do it.

this year is about improving me and I have started that.

love D

down under feminists carnival

its up and my breastfeeding in public piece is in it.. yay me.... there are some awesome feminists blogging that are well worth reading so go ahead and enjoy

project 2011

I found this on another blog.. but its all about keeping yourself accountable by blogging on Thursdays what you have achieved this week...... I am going to use it as a way to keep myself on track for my goals this year....

to do this year

this year I want to.....

• enjoy time with my husband, children, parents, sister, other family and friends
• lose 10kg, not because of vanity but because of health
• further develop Black Bow designs
• declutter, esp my wardrobe....
• learn to sew better (learn some new skills and pattern drafting etc)

a small list but obtainable I think....

love D