while reading facebook tonight I came across this rather well written dear John letter.... It made me grin.
I think it's best to be honest about our feelings, don't you?
I would be lying if I said our relationship started off great, and that
it's only starting to deteriorate now. It was never meant to be, let's
face it. You basically pushed yourself onto me that night in November
2008, and no matter what I did or said you just kept on hanging around.
It was pretty awkward. I tried to ignore it for a while, thinking you
would turn out to be fairly harmless, but the situation really is
getting worse and worse. It's past the point of awkward, and it's
becoming damaging. I tried to break up with you last year, but you just
wouldn't stop coming back. You even brought that guy Banks with you -
and you always knew how much I didn't trust him! Look John, It's been
three and a half years, and I want something more from my life. I think
we're better off apart.
I know, I know... You keep telling me
that you want to look after me, that you care about me. You want me to
have a prosperous, healthy future. But John, actions speak louder than
words. If you really loved me, you wouldn't be doing half the things you
do. If you want me to be happy, and have a future of golden
opportunities, you need to stop trying to sell my stuff, and trying to
get me to buy it back from you. You need to stop making it hard for me
to live on a decent income. You need to let me be well educated without
charging me through the nose, so that I can make informed decisions for
myself. You need to allow me to make my own decisions about my own
Also, my friends and family don't like you - I know
that's harsh, but you've been pretty harsh to them actually. It's really
embarrassing when we go out and my mates who are struggling to find
work at the moment ask me why you're being stink to them. For someone
who grew up in a state house, you have very little empathy for others in
similar situations. You also have this really weird double persona that
makes my friends distrust you - you act like you're everyone's best
mate, but then you make out like you know better than everyone else and
make really dumb decisions that put everyone at risk. Just because you
won on the currency trading markets back in the '80s, doesn't mean you
have a great mind for business. And you have got to stop promoting
gambling. Some of my friends have gambling problems, and you're only
making it worse by increasing pokie machines. I know you're really nice
to your own friends, but if you want to be with me then you need to be
nice to my friends too.
Oh - and don't think that I don't know
where you've been when you come home late from "meetings". Like that
time you went to America in 2009 - you acted all innocent, hanging out
with David Letterman (I don't think I've ever been so embarrassed by
anyone by the way), but I know you were actually there trying it on with
those glamourous bankers. Those foreign corporate hussies will flirt
with you, but they don't really like you - they just know how to play
you while you fall over yourself trying to make yourself attractive to
them. I know when I'm being fooled, but you clearly don't.
It's not me, it's you. I've tried reasoning with you, but you just don't
listen. I want your bags packed and out of here by the time I get back.